Xie xie, laoshi.

Today was just a day where I thought, I LOVE my kids. I LOVE being in China. It wasn't anything exceptional, but I just felt so much love and so much gratitude for where I am, and for all the little choice Spirits who surround me here. I teach sixth grade and fourth grade this week. It pretty much boggles my gosh-dang mind that in a country the church is pretty much banned, I have more daily affirmations of the gospel's reality and God's love for me and for his people than ever before. It's amazing. Also, as a side note, there was a period of time growing up where I thought the expression was "mind-bottling" instead of mind-boggling. Like. Something was so crazy it ...put your mind in a bottle. I also thought I was a horse instead of a girl. :/ Don't you even worry. This little filly's done some maturing? (NOT.)

 This morning, I taught my first class Module 2 on Hobbies. I taught them that hobbies are something that is fun, that you love to do, that make you happy! So, a little back-story. I try to make sure I do something at least once a class that gets the kids talking to me on a personal level. They need that individual connection and attention. Their little brown eyes are hungry for it. They just want to be looked at and SEEN. So, for review at the end of the hobbies lesson, I was going around the room, asking my kids about themselves. They'd stand up and say, "My name is ____. And my hobby is/my hobbies are _____." Today, I got to one kid in the front, and he stood up kind of bashfully. I thought that was pretty weird since this little punk (who is pretty much the tiny, sweater-vested love of my LIFE) is so smart. He's totally an over-participator. We make faces at each other all lesson long. I KNEW he knew the English. He got up and kept mumbling his introduction. Finally, I got down to where I knew we were making eye contact, and asked him about himself aaaaagain.

And do you know what he said? "My hobby, teacher, is very liking you." And then he turned bright red and sat down. UM. Oh, where's my heart? Gone. Paula Deen stole it when it melted into butter just now. It was the sweetest thing ever.

In the afternoon, my first class would not participate and wouldn't try. That's pretty much the most frustrating thing in the world, and I walked out feeling like a crappy teacher. And exhausted, and hoarse. And I get that classes like that happen. Can't make every shot. Can't hit every pitch. Can't... something-else-that-sounds-sporty-and-inspirational. I wasn't exactly stoked to go to my last class of the day, is what I'm getting at.

But I did. Obviously. Don't want to give the administration yet another reason to set me afire/ignore my existence.

First of all, they burst into applause the second I walked in. They furiously scribbled everything I wrote/said/did, without being asked. They were SO interested, and so happy to see me. As I walked around checking their work, they kept asking me questions about myself. What is my favorite place in America, etc. I answered like two questions in Chinese, and they spent the rest of class telling me how clever and beautiful I am. Spoiler alert: I am the opposite. I am also super self-conscious of speaking Chinese aloud, even when I know the phrase, because I know I sound like an idiot. Some people have the gift of tongues. I do not. I have some gifts with my tongue. But not THE gift. (Hahahaha, MOM. I'm kidding? It's FINE.) I am also pretty frustrated because no one around the school will teach me, even when I ask. Not even my little helper guy Victor.. and I mean. Come on. I thought he and I were in a committed relationship. (Did I blog about how he offered to whisper me a song? And then did? If not. I need to.) But my kids that class were SO excited every time I even tried a phrase, and so eager to teach me more. They were so proud of me, and it turned the whole afternoon around.

And finally, the cherry on top. So, I pray every day for a missionary opportunity, yes? They come in all forms here. Sometimes I can see them when I go to bed at night - like, OH! Heyyyy. That's what that was. Sometimes I see them as they happen. Sometimes I never see them. But I truly believe that they come, because Heavenly Father is so good like that. So today, after that last class, I decided to just chill in my office at the school for a while - even though I was done for the day and even though no one will really interact with me. You can just call me the Chinese leper. :/ After pointing at the rainy window and telling me I should wear more clothes (but I was already in a sweater and dress pants, so where was he going with that?), Victor peaced out, and I was thinking, probs about time for me to do the same. But the Spirit was just like, Wait just a minute. So I did. I was scrolling through random pictures on my laptop when a female teacher came in, kind of man-handling this kid who was sobbing hardcore.

Here's something I can tell you about Chinese children. They are pretty rarely, if ever, out of control or excessively emotional. It was startling. His little countenance was so, so sad. He was upset and lost. The administrator in my office kind of laughed at him at first, then gave an exasperated sigh. Then he gave him a buck-up speech (Listen. I know that speech in any language) and looked away. The kid just stood there all crying and humiliated, and unacknowledged, and it reminded me so vividly not only of some days I had in elementary (oh, you never peed the Magic Rug in first grade? Oh)... but also of a couple days I had here at the school to start with. I tried to keep the annoyance out of my face while I got this darling kid a glass of water. I led him over to my chair and had him sit for a while as I just squatted next to him rubbing his little heaving back. The administrator kept telling me meishi, meishi - basically, it's okay, it's okay - and waving the kid out of my chair. I wasn't having it. Finally, the administrator noticed the kid wasn't going anywhere and gave the little boy his cell phone to call his mom. I was so grateful. When he left, he turned his little tear-stained face to me and said, "Xie xie laoshi."

Thank you, teacher.

And my heart smiled. I know that sounds super lame, but that's the best way I can describe today.

I'm not sharing this story because I want to self-promote or make what little service I could give visible. I'm sharing it because today was yet another testimony building instance, yet another confirmation that I am where I need to be. Even on the days that I feel inadequate or inept, the days where I feel lost and insignificant, these children help me remember my worth and purpose. They teach me so much about charity and acceptance, and the need to look for opportunities to serve, to thank, and to seize them when you see them. They teach me of Christ, and although they do not know him by name yet in their lives, their little Spirits know Him.

Basically, I am the luckiest shart alive to be spending another month and a half here. It has gone by way too fast. I neeeever want it to end. And I know I've been a crappy blogger and that I still need to blog about National Holiday in Chinese Hawaii and also, oh, you know. The tiny fact that I HAVE DECIDED TO START MY PAPES FOR MY MISH. Whaaaat? Yes. Those things should be recorded. And I will get to them.

But for today, I just wanted to share how truly beautiful, and trying, and worthwhile a typical day in China really is.

Update: I am happy.