Get Shelby To Do It!

Last night was a pretty interesting night for me, I must say. I had an invitation to go watch the sunset with someone, and we're not gonna say who but let's just say it was gonna be AWESOME, until I realized I had a hike for young womens. I shrugged it off, you know, thought to myself, "Its chill, its cool, you'll totally be back in time." Um, no. So I had to call someone, we're not gonna say who but let's just say he's AWESOME, and tell him I wasn't gonna be back in time. "Why, you ask? Oh, I'll just be hiking up Ensign peak with my mutual group... Yeah. Don't worry about it." The church has got some pretty sneaky ways of preventing you from being friends with any boys except the creepers in your ward. Yep.

Generally, I like hiking. So even though I couldn't be at my AWESOME sunset fest, I wasn't even too upset by it. It was cloudy all day, so I pulled on my favoritest jeans, which by the way look and feel like they're going to rip every time I wear them; literally, its just a waiting game at this point. Everytime I wear them I feel like a wild woman. My favorite young womens leader, Jill pulled up at like six forty-five and I ran out to the van. Whew. When did the sun come out from behind the clouds? Holy shnauzers, man. So I had to run back in and change into some ridiculously long shorts because this is young women, people. Modest is hottest. Jill of course waited for me, because she is a gem of humanity. I really probably wouldn't even attend mutual every week if it weren't for her.


We picked up all the girls, all cute in their little hiking short shorts. It was all pleasantries and smiles, but I was definitely silently cursing myself for not wearing some track shorts or something. Modest is hottest should be taken way more literally. I was probably producing enough sweltering heat under those shorts to heat an entire third world country. For a week. After sitting through about twenty minutes of being told that if I played soccer, I would be exactly like Bridget in Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, the sunset was looking pretty tempting. Because, okay, it really is a compliment to be told I'm like Bridget. Its not nearly a bad thing. But freak, I'm not athletic, and I will prove it by aiming a kick at your bony little butt and instead having it land somewhere else entirely if you guys don't stop yammering! Yahtzee, these people! Luckily, Andrea rescued me with some Belle and Sebastian on her iPod before I could go postal. There is only so much a girl can take.

Ensign Peak is not a pretty hike. I've conquered Adams Canyon many a time, and with all the greenery and the river, I hardly notice how far I'm going until I've reached the waterfall. Adams is one of those hikes where you just feel good, and more energized afterwards. I used to go hike it a couple times a week with Mariah until she got in her longboard accident and I sprained my ankle. We're both better now and I think we totally need to get back on that. Anyway, the path is a cement sidewalk half the way up. There's yellow grass all around you. You get tired so much faster when there's nothing to hold your attention. Lets have a little gander here at the comparison of Ensign to Adams:

What a toss up, eh? Which one would you rather go to if you had just sacraficed what could have very possibly been one of the greatest nights ever?



I got to the front of the pack when we got higher up cause everyone was gettin' skittish, and that was fun because I actually got to jog a little. We were coming up on a little group of young men and I heard some of the girls giggling and being all, "I'm not gonna do it! That's awkward! I'm too scared! Get Shelby to do it!" I suppose considering my persona in general, I now have something of a reputation. Of course they were all too "awkward" and "scared" to ask me, so I was all, "What am I gonna do?" There was a young men's group coming down, and they wanted me to ask them if they were young men. Okay? Whoo. That's crazy talk! So I did it, cause its really not a big deal. I mean, its stupid for sure, but really not awkward or anything. But, I'll release you from the suspsense, they were young men! Oh goody!


When we got to the top, the view was cool. It would have been pretty if the whole valley wasn't covered in pollution. As it was, it just made me sad. Anyway, being the rebel I am, I attempted all sorts of scandilous feats, such as going an inch beyond the sign that read, "Do NOT Go Beyond This Sign" and standing on the railing at the overhang. Another group got up there pretty fast and I guess some of the boys in the group were way good looking. I say I guess because generally, I really don't check people out. I know that sounds weird. But honestly, I see people, and I might think they're attractive, but I'm to the point where until I talk to someone, I really don't know if I find them attractive. Or sometimes, I do talk to people, but so much so that I don't even realize that they are attractive. And then it has to be pointed out to me, like, "Hey they're attractive." And I think about it for a second and I'm almost surprised. Like, "Oh yeah. They are."


So I didn't even notice that this one kid was attractive until Amanda pointed him out. Then, because I was pretty bitter about missing the AWESOME sunset and had nothing to lose, I just started being really loud and awkward about it because he was leaning on the railing a few feet down from us. I was saying things such as "Oh, Mr. Amazing over there. Mmmm!" "Break me off a piece of that man candy!" "Look at him. What a perfect man." and other such creepy things. Oh, and then I would creepily smile at him until he looked over. And then I would just keep on trucking until he looked away. So basically, I'd lost all dignity up on that mountain, and I was FINE with that, because it wasn't being forceably taken, I was giving it away at this point. The kid was totally checking out Amanda, and come on, who wouldn't? She's adorable. So I was trying to get her to get his number, but she wouldn't go for it.


It just made me laugh, because I remember being that shy. Granted, it really wasn't that long ago. But its hard to even remember a time where people didn't "get Shelby to do it." I guess I just kind of gave up caring about stuff that doesn't matter. I'm not gonna lie, its an awesome way to be. Why not be an idiot around people you're never gonna see again? Why not live on the edge? Why wear makeup all the time? Why dress cute all the time? I'm so glad I'm over all of that. Yessss. So even though I might be like some brazen harlot who has no boundaries to my young womens, I'm feeling pretty good about it, I don't know.


I was pretty proud of myself that I hadn't noticed Hot Kid first, because as he hiked down in front of us, I was already unimpressed with him. He had chicken legs and walked on his toes like some sort of Man Princess. It was awful. So maybe I'm glad Amanda was too scared to get his number. I really love her, FYI. She's just the nicest, funnest girl ever. She's going places. We had a nice talk on the way down about boys, and I think she's gonna do really well in ninth grade this year.


We decided the best kind of boys are the ones who laugh at your inappropriate humor and who listen to you. The kind of boys that don't care how you look because they just like to talk to you so much. The kind of boys who will sit around and do nothing with you and make it fun. The kind of boys who would rather hang out than make out. The kind of guy who's just like a best friend, not eye candy, is the one you wanna date. (It doesn't hurt if your best friend is hot.) But really, just someone who's your friend first. Someone who's always gonna be there. Ah, man.

We got back down and some Japanese tourist couple got way mad at us for not giving them four parking spaces for their tiny hybrid. I watched the sunset from a car window with Andrea half asleep on my shoulder. It wasn't really how I pictured my sunset that night, but it wasn't terrible. I really like the girls in my ward and it was a fun night. Crazy as it sounds, I'm glad they know they can "get Shelby to do it!"


I got home and watched T.V. alone. My mom got back from Southern Utah and scolded me for eating too many pickles. She told me it would give me a stomachache. I had three more after that.


You know me, living on the edge. What a crazy woman.