Maybe Our Economy Isn't The Problem.

So, I woke up today, and my face was peeling. Let's just say I tried some face treatment and it went wrong, all so wrong! So yesterday, my face had these little boil/blisters/what-have-you all over it, and it was swollen. So I iced it and put aloe on it and lo and behold, the boils of bad were gone. But in their place? A peeling palooza. Now, I'm not talking a little soft flaky, I'm talking my face felt like the hand of a seasoned farmer whose callouses have callouses... that have callouses. Which is depressing, since the whole point was to make my face baby butt soft anyway.

Nevertheless, I moisturized (to no avail, the spot practically made slurping noises as it drank in the lotion, and I just had to think, WHERE IS THAT EVEN GOING?) and tried to put on foundation and whatnot. Well, then getting ready was easy, since (cough cough) I DON'T! I am not doing my hair for a month, and quite possibly not even for the rest of the school year. I am DESPERATE to grow it out, so, I have been taking 5000 mcgs of Biotin each day, drinking more water, and letting it go au natural. Yes friends, that means absolutely no straightening, not brushing it everyday, and especially not when its wet, no blow drying at all, and using Mane and Tail Shampoo and Conditioner. Also, I massage my scalp with a little olive every few nights. And my voodoo magic seems to have paid off a little as far as I can tell. The texture of my hair is glorious, like that of a newborn child. And it seems to have grown a little bit faster. Long hair by summer, cross your fingers (I've only been trying to grow it out for two freaking years, so. Yeah. Cross them). P.S. If you personally have any voodoo magic that made your hair grow faster, please share the wealth. Seriously.

Moral of that long-winded, infomercial-like story, is that after I shower and do my makeup, I just sit. Mostly on the heater, but this morning on the heater with the COMPUTER! I know, right. So I got on Facebook, cause I'm a Facebook creep, and I got to talk to my friend Christopher who lives in Taiwan because his parents are mission presidents over there. Well, I'll just be honest, I love that kid. Pretty much makes my favorite people list. So, that made me happy. I even had a piece of toasted heaven, (you probably call them Toaster Strudels), so I was thinking to myself, "Shelby-shmelby-banana-fanna-fo-felby-shmee-shmi-shm... where am I even going with that? I don't really know. Welp, in other news its probably going to be a good day." Yeah, good one, internal narration, except NOT AT ALL!

I went into World Civ and I was all jazzed because I did my assignment and went the extra mile and whatnot. Do you think she paid one bit of attention? No. It was almost comical. Actually, it was comical. She got all the other rows assignments and skipped our row. So I just had everyone's assignments in a stack on my desk and I was all, "Do you want these?" And she's all, "What I want is for you to have your work out and ready when I call for it! Bla bla bla I'm an angry woman." So.. it got awkward and she came and yanked them out of my hand. Then someone timidly pointed out that she just forgot to collect them when she called for them, and that we actually had them out before she even called for them. And she just raised on of her precisely tweezed brows and gave me a scuzzy. Yeah.. thanks for that.

So then we got in this huge thing about how bad the economy is and how we're all going to die. Mm. Morning killer, much? And we watched clips of people living in tent camps. So happy.. um, totally. So basically I wanted to jump out the window because it would probably have improved the overall mood in the room. Then people were FREAKING out that our guided notes were in a different order than her slideshow. And I was like, really? Are we in fourth grade? Imagine if you actually had to WRITE the notes. Hahahaha, but then my tender friend Cody yelled, "ADAPT!" in the most awesome voice I ever heard, and it made me happy again. What can I say? I'm easily cheered.

So after the bell wrang, I was off to theater. I'll be honest, its kind of the highlight of my day. So I got down to the bottom of the stairs and found my friend Leah. We were all making excited noises and doing weird voices to greet each other when she just.. stopped. I looked up and a young man, let's call him... Murt. Yeah, so Murt was walking by and her whole persona changed. And she just turned to me and was like, "I have to tell you something. But not here." So we powerwalked on down to the theater room, because I could tell it was urgent. Its kind of crazy how much a safe place the theater room can be in that hectic high school.

But we got inside and put our stuff down, and I kind of smiled, cause I love the theater room. Everytime I'm in there it feels like an exhale, like I've been holding my breath all day and now I can just let it out. I love that. And then Leah drops this bomb about Murt. Holy. It was so.. out of left field. I sat on my desk and it sort of felt like everything was moving extra fast except for me. I was just staying sitting there, and things were passing me by in fast forward. I don't know if you've ever had that happen, but its like you're stuck in your own movie music montage and you can't get out.

It was weird, because I heard this about Murt, and I almost wanted to feel hurt. But I didn't feel that, and in the midst of this weird news, that was kind of a victory. I just was so disappointed in him. It just felt so unreal, but the more I thought about it, the more I could accept it. But other than that, I was fine. But then I looked at Leah. And I got so mad. Because I could see that it hurt her and I hated that he did that to her. I was so sad he did that in general, because it was sort of the final stamp on an already outgoing package.

I guess it was just one of those sucky, growing up moments. You know, where you hear someone did something and you think that there is no way your best friend could do that. But then you realize, that "Murt" isn't your best friend, isn't that person, anymore. However, I learned a lot about myself during theater today. I was able to go work on my scene with Joe and get everything out, all the anger and disappointment about it, without actually talking about it. And once we finished rehearsing, I was able to walk off and leave it onstage. I was fine. That's kind of awesome, I'm not going to lie. But Leah just was so not okay. I felt so bad, on so many levels, but it wasn't for me, it was for her. I'm glad I'm so over things to the point where my worry could just be for her. As for me, I spent the rest of the period laughing at improv games and remembering stuff from when I talked to Chris. I just love quotable lines. Here's a croc hunting gem:

"Crikey, reach on in there and feel 'is eyeball." -Danny
"Ah! Its sharp, why is his eyeball sharp?" -me
"Oh, sheila, that's just 'is teeth, a bit higher. Feel that on in there. Gooey, in'it?" -Danny
"....So gooey!" -me

So then I went to seminary, and although I was worried about Leah, I felt so good that that is all I was about Murt. I am over Murt. Hahahahah. Murt. Anywho, I went to seminary, and took a stop in the bathroom on the way. Oh, d'you think my face was peeling off? Yeah, it was. I had a freaking SKIN BEARD, there were just random pieces hanging off of my face. So I tried to rub some of it off, and frankly, just gave up. The Spirit doesn't care if I've got a skin beard, so I headed on down to seminary. I made friends with this way cute girl who was in my seminary class last semester, we just never really talked until now. I seriously love her. She's amazing. Just as we were becoming buds, we got a new seating arrangement. And I was kind of like, are you serious? I was at this table with two boys who kind of freak me out. Let's call them "300-pound-football-creeper" and "can't-stop-insulting-people-long-enough-to-tie-his-own-shoes-so-his-mom-does-it-for-him." Or.. maybe just Big Creeper and Meanyface. Yeah, that'll be easier to type.

Alright, so basically, Big Creeper was like, "Bla bla bla, me 300 pounds and play defensive line, ooh, fall all over me because my arm is the size of your waist." And I was all, "Listen, up, Big Creeper, you need to lay off." Then Meanyface is all, "Ooh, you're a squashmore, I'm going to try to flirt with you because I'm mean and think every girl is an object and/or conquest because I've never been shot down before bladdy bla BLA." Basically, I cursed the heavens the whole period, and I think, no I KNOW, that that is not what you're supposed to be doing in seminary.

Basically, there are a blessed few things that peeve me in this world. Very few mind you, and usually I can write even those off by recalling funny jokes, quotable quotes, good times, etc. But today, it was just not a good day for me to sit there. I wanted to hop up on the table, grab the scriptures and swing them around hunched over making ape noises and stamping on both of their faces... I don't know. Because, its like they picked everything that would bug me.

First of all, I really dislike when people try to use cruelty and insults as flirting. What the?! Yeah, you got it stud. If you want me to like you, definitely tell me I have the ugliest face you've ever seen and then wink at me. Seriously. Did you just wink at me? Got something in your eye there, bucko? Need me to get it out with my nails? How's about I jab at it, it'll come right out. What's that? You think I should shave my legs more often? Hm. Well, if my legs were half as impressive as your four haired sideburns, maybe I would.

Honestly. If you want me to like you, don't insult me. Seems elementary, right? Don't ask for my number after an hour and a half of verbally abusing me and tearing apart my facial structure, dress code, body shape, and shoe size. Really. Just, don't.

Also, do not get touchy feely with me. Just because you play football does not mean I want your freaky baseball mitt hands all up on me. Don't be cocky and say I look like I'm into you. Don't make jokes like, "Oh if you don't think people getting hurt is funny, why do you watch football?" to which I respond dully, "Do I watch football?" and you respond, "Yeah, don't think I didn't hear you all year in the stands screaming my name." Yeah, actually you DIDN'T cause I wasn't there, creeper. Don't stroke my hair, face, arms, legs, any part of my being/person/essence. Don't ask about my love life, why I'm still single, try to make me laugh, steal my shoe and pretend to cradle it to yourself. Just, dooooon't.

Oh, then at lunch, I went to Bowman's with Leah, Lisa, and Katy to get some fruit gushers. And you know what? I saw some people there that I didn't think would make things an issue and they did. It was junior high. I get it. You think you're a big, hot high school jock just because you can text girls and palm a basketball. When you actually talk to a girl in person or get us a state championship, then you can surely taunt and mock me. Hahahah. At least then you will deserve it.
Sweet mercy. At least in eighth period, we just got a chill day. Got to curl up in my enormous man hoody, and go into sweet, sweet antisocial hibernation. We popped in our iPods and laid with our heads on our desks and tried to get inspiration for what we have to write next period. Music is easy, because if you're not thinking too hard, it puts you right between thought and sleep. It's nice, I'm not even going to lie about it.

After eighth period, I was walking out to get a ride with my cousin Megan. My friend Jake stopped and talked to me, asked about my day, and it was nice to have someone genuinely care and listen. I was in a better mood when I walked to the doors to go out. There was a kid before me. Looked back, made full eye contact with me, saw that my hands were full. Slid through the closing door and let it shut on me. For some reason, this made me a little sad. Not like, oh poor me, but like, oh poor humanity. Like, really buddy? You can't even reach an arm back for the standard wrist flip that keeps the door open 2 seconds longer even if you keep walking? Wow. Thanks.

It just was sort of a discouraging people day, which happens sometimes, but it was also a good people day because I got to talk to my friend Christopher and had a good improv day in Theater. I know the economy is bad, and I don't really know too much about it, but I think maybe the world would be a lot better place if people were actually caring about others. Genuinely thoughtful, looking out for other people, whether they're your best friend or not. I saw this commercial on t.v. and it made me think, am I like that? And I really, really want to be, despite my rantings. I want to be the kind of person who builds people up, who just does a little something that maybe doesn't mean anything to the other person, but maybe it does. The person who cares about people whether they're an ex best friend, a worst enemy, or someone you've never seen in your life. Moral of the story, with the economy and all this crazy world's-ending stuff? There are bigger things than money or texting or clothes. We're all people. We're all in this together. So, let's look out for each other. Deal?

:)

Enjoy.